This extra post is only for
those who are
weary … or … fearful
… or …
running … or …faking
until they make it …
If you have “it all
together,” don’t bother reading this (until you’re ready for it, cause we all come to a place of despair sooner or
later).
A recent loss shook my
world in ways I didn't expect. Facing different waves of emotions, I somehow
closed my heart off to God. Not completely. Just in certain areas. I allowed my
heart to become very guarded against God's love... Maybe I was afraid that God
would ask too much of me? Maybe I felt that if I protected myself from God's
love, that I wouldn't have to feel more pain? I really don't
like to feel pain...
Yet, if it weren't for
the pain, I doubt I'd understand joy. I don’t understand how or why, but it
seems to me that the emotions of joy and pain intertwine. When I accept pain (ugh), I face it and accept Abba’s plan
for my life – even if He would choose to slay me. Not a pleasant thought.
In fact, it’s downright scary!
To lay my life, my dreams, my wants, my hopes, my “rights” down – the point of
NOoooo return??? Well, OF COURSE it’s
easier to close my heart up and only delve into shallow waters! To only love
God to the 4’ mark, instead of diving into 30’ waters. To close the door to further
cross-carrying, than to open that heavy squeaky door that’s covered over with interwoven
ivy-weeds of Fear and Worry who continue to shout “SHUT THE DOOR!”
I can’t do anything to
bring back the one I’ve lost. I can’t change my circumstances (the ones which I
know God’s put in my life for this season). But I can choose to let my heart
melt or harden in the hands of the One who was, and is, and is to come.
So, tell me. Like me, have
you been guarding your heart lately - from people, or more importantly, from the
Lover of your soul? [Are you afraid?
Good! You’re alive then. Fear reminds
us that faith is required for the next step. And I, for one, think that the
struggle is HARD and WORTH it. When we face the struggle and tell God we CAN’T,
but we WANT to… that’s Jehovah’s business, ladies!!!]
So, my fellow Marthas,
let’s remember together how to sit and listen, like Mary did. Hang up your “stuff”
& your “doings” for a while. Rest in
Jesus, so that your goings and doings become an outpouring of a relationship
so much deeper than the one you’ve been trying to make happen.
He wants you to
simply BE.
BE yourself. Trust
HIM for the rest.
I encourage you to find
a quiet time – ALONE - to listen to You're My Beloved (under 4 minutes); just
focus on Abba and your relationship together. Rest in Him. Cast off those
cares. Forget all your responsibilities for the moment. Hear His heart beat for
you. Allow your heart to melt before the awesome - and
TENDER - Father Creator, who loves you so incredibly much.
Now, I know I'll get in
trouble from at least one if I don't suggest tissues (you know who you are. Tee
hee.). Some of you aren't emotional gals, and I understand that. However, may I ever
so gently suggest – if you don't tear up at all while focusing on
Abba's love for you – could it be that you're allowing your heart to be hard
and guarded? Maybe we all would be wise
to ask Him to melt those guarded lesions on our hearts before we listen, and
take the time to listen again & again until we finally melt in His arms.
(As with all of MY words, take or leave them... What Abba says is what really
matters.)
Abba, we need you to
melt our hearts. Teach us who You are & who you see when you see us. Teach
us to soak in your love & to rest in your tenderness. Heal our brokenness,
pour salve where we're hardened, and give us courage to look into your eyes.
Give us strength to lay down ourselves and to fully abide in Christ Jesus alone
- until He's our everything and nothing else matters. In Jesus' name...
"Then
Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens,
and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because
I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your
souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.” -
Matthew 11:28-30, The New Living Translation
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